Ok, really people. Just because people think that this is the socially acceptable time frame of my life to have children, does not mean I want to have them. Ever.
My mother gets the biggest kick out of telling me who the latest person is to ask her when she's going to have grandchildren. She just laughs. It will be a long time, seeing as though my brother is only a senior in high school, and hopefully far away from father hood. Because let me tell you,
THERE WILL BE NO CHILDREN FROM ME.
She gets it, my whole family gets it, but that seems to be about it. Even some of my closest friends just keep telling me that I will change my mind. HA! Good luck with that one folks. It's not going to happen, and no, just because I deny it that strongly, does not mean that I secretly harbor an affection for blobs of flesh without souls.
Yes, I called them blobs of flesh without souls. They aren't cute, puking and pooping is all they are good for. They don't communicate in any intellectual manner, they don't have thought processes, and they are just a general pain to everyone that has them. People say that the positives outweigh those up at 3am, screaming, crying, diaper changing negatives. I have no idea what those positives are. A baby spends all of your money, you don't have a life of your own anymore, traveling, doing what you want is totally out of the question, and for what? A spit laden smile? Gross.
Hate me if you want. I don't hate you for having children, populate the earth, that kid will pay for my social security someday, just keep it the hell away from me if you want it to live. I'll just put it in a closet and forget about it.
Until it turns 12 or so. Then it can formulate properly enough and I can handle it. Then it becomes a person.
But go ahead and keep asking my mother, she finds it hilarious.
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